


If Only I knew How...

by DeathOfAFangirl



Category: Heroes of Olympus - Fandom, HoO - Fandom, PJO - Fandom, Percy Jackson and the Olympians
Genre: Drowning, F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi, Song fic, Soon-to-be one sided Percico/PerNico, Sucicidal, how to save a life, slight mentions of past percabeth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-05
Updated: 2015-05-05
Packaged: 2018-03-29 02:36:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3878929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeathOfAFangirl/pseuds/DeathOfAFangirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Percy never knew. And even if her did, He had no idea How To Save A Life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	If Only I knew How...

~Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend~

Percy stared as the coffin was lowered. Since when was Nico like this…? How had he not seen it!? He watched as the coffin finally sank into the earthy hole, and he could hear Hazel’s sobs. 

The poor girl had already lost her mother, she couldn’t talk to her father without risking her life, and now her only other family member—Nico Di Angelo. Frank gently patted her back, reassuring her that Nico was in a better place, with Pluto/Hades. But Hazel still cried, she cried because she hadn’t seen it. She hadn’t seen any of it. 

~Somewhere along the bitterness~

She didn’t see pain in his eyes, the red angry slashes on his wrists, or how pale he’d become even after Tartarus. She didn’t notice how he stopped talking. How he stopped coming to the dining pavilion when she visited, and only came to New Rome when she requested it. She cried. She sobbed. She did anything she could to force the pain away. 

~And I would’ve stayed up with you all Night~

But nothing worked. It just kept flooding back. If she had noticed, would he have pushed her away, or would he let her in? But that wasn’t the most troubling question that plagued her mind, the one that was, was why? Why would he do such a thing? Why would he, Nico Di Angelo, do such a thing? To such lengths, to kill himself? 

~Had I known How To Save A Life~

And he picked one horrible way to die. Percy stared out at the view from the cemetery. Nio was being buried right next to Bianca’s grave. A little after the accident, the Huntress’s of Artemis went on a recovery mission and returned with her body. Percy could feel the tears well up in his eyes, but he willed them down. He needed to be strong, not just for himself, but for Hazel, for Jason, for Nico. He just didn’t get it. 

~As he begins to raise his voice  
You lower yours and grant him one last choice~ 

Why would he drown himself under the dock by Camp Half-Blood? Why would he carve into his skin: Ti Amo, Perseus Jackson. Why didn’t he just tell him!? Percy couldn't comprehend it. Did Nico truly love Percy? If so… why not just tell him? 

~Drive Until you lose the road   
Or break the ones you’ve followed~

It was hours after the ceremony. Nico’s decaying cold body had been placed into the ground… The eternal place for the Children of Hades. 

“I was afraid.” 

~He will do one of two things   
He will admit to everything~

Percy whipped his head around, the voice came from his bed, and seeing what he saw, the usually warm breeze in his cabin was a cold smack in the face. 

“Nico?” 

“I… I was afraid you wouldn’t- No… That you couldn’t accept me how I was. How I felt. Because sadly, I’m a child of the 40’s…” 

Percy’s eyes stung with tears. And this time, he let them fall. 

~Or he’ll say he’s just not the same  
And you’ll begin to wonder why you came~

“Ti Amo, Perseus Jackson.” 

~Where did I go wrong   
I lost a Friend~

“Nico…” 

~Somewhere along in the bitterness~

“I love you…” 

~And I would have stayed up with you all night~

The image of Nico faded, leaving only a wisp of memory engraved in Percy’s mind.   
“I love you too…” Percy whispered into the dark, quiet cabin. “I always have…” 

His salty tears ran down his face as he fell onto his bed. 

“And I always will, Nico…” He sobbed into his pillow, drifting off eventually. 

~Had I Known, How To Save A Life~

*~*~*This Work Will Also Be Posted on 

Fanfiction.net under: Http-JustAnotherGirl 

And/Or

Quotev.com under: @.Awesomenessness (URL) *~*~*


End file.
